Written by Stephanie Orphanacos
I just need to relax. My neck and back are killing me. I find myself getting out of my chair one vertebrate at a time and I slowly straighten so that I don’t pull any obscure but painful muscle on the way up. I move with thought and precision now. What did I get up for in the first place? I’ve totally forgotten what I was going to do. Arghh! Clearly, it’s time to find my centre.
Oddly enough, it sometimes takes all of these symptoms working in unison to get me to recognize that I need to stop. It’s time! I have to put away my computer AND my cell phone. Turn off that latest course and shut down my ongoing Sudoku game. My body is amped up. My adrenals are working overtime and I need to power down and do something constructive for my body and my brain. I need to be more thoughtful about what, why and how much stress I put on myself. I am definitely my own worst enemy.
So, here we go. What should I do first? There is nothing easier than taking a couple of deep, cleansing breaths. Breathe in love and light, and breathe out stress and fatigue. Breathe in peace and tranquility, and breathe out criticism and judgement. You know, this actually works! The National Institutes of Health has an extensive library of articles that support the conclusion that taking slow, deep breaths has a number of fairly immediate effects on our body, our brain and our emotional well-being.
Taking a few breaths activates our body’s para-sympathetic functions. Our heart rate slows, and there is an immediate decrease in stress hormones like cortisol flooding our system. There is an increased flow of blood to our major muscles that helps to release muscle tension and alleviate chronic pain. Our digestion improves and we begin to benefit from the nutrients in our diet. There is an increased immune response so we are better able to fight off bacteria and viral interlopers.
Our brains also benefit from this purposeful breath work. It begins to release endorphins, aka feel-good hormones. This clears our heads of the cobwebs and the clutter. Our thinking is more defined and focused. Those problems, which just an hour ago seemed overwhelming, are now work-out-able. This new insight is so encouraging it leads to better concentration and the ability to parse out the problems and puzzles in our life. And if clear-headedness and better concentration aren’t enough, taking those few simple, cleansing breaths directly improves our memory and decision-making capabilities.
The best part for me is the feeling that I am better able to control my emotions. Feelings like depression and anxiety start to diminish. Mood improves and we can think of ourselves and of others with compassion. This goes a long way toward releasing those feelings that are no longer serving us: the fears, the doubts and harsh judgements. A kinder mindset often leads to more self-awareness. An awareness of where we are emotionally is particularly helpful. This gives us the opportunity to reschedule those conversations or events that trigger our defensive responses to a time when we are in a better space. Think of all the battles you don’t have to fight if we all approached our relationships from this perspective. Becoming a kinder, gentler, more understanding society is within our reach!
I am on a journey to change my response to stress. I’m doing this in part by breathing consciously and purposefully. I find calm and then I get distracted and I lose it again. I have gotten better at recognizing that I’ve become distracted. I don’t berate myself anymore for this. I just recognize that I am distracted and move on. I get back to the business of breathing and relaxing. And yes, I still occasionally need that in-your-face reminder that I have been relapsing and running on adrenaline before I recalibrate. It has certainly gotten easier over time to find that place of calm.
What do you do to find your centre?
Stephanie Orphanacos B.A., Q.Med
About Stephanie
After working in the social service system for over 30 years, Stephanie felt there were too many children and youth who were falling through the cracks. She offers Counselling and Coaching to families who are at the beginning, middle or end of the road with their child who has challenges.
Stephanie is always available to chat with families who are struggling without passing judgement on their current circumstances. She works together with you to make a plan and find the services that most closely meet the needs of your child or your young adult.
Stephanie contributes to the Wild About Wellness Community online where members passionate about holistic health and wellness come together to share information, educate and contribute for the purpose of learning and growing. You are invited to explore the site with a free 1-month membership. Get your 1-month free membership HERE.